It’s Been So Long That I’m Writing About It

A while back dating was brought up in a conversation I was having with either my sister or my Buddy. I can’t remember. What I do remember is that I could not remember that last real date I’d been on. Everything I was coming up with just didn’t seem to count. There was hookah, but that was more of a meeting to mend old wounds. Plus, we went dutch. Before that was the movies, but that was kind of like that last-ditch do we have something here still kind of thing. Nothing even remotely romantic about it. It was actually kind of awkward. I’ll stop there.

Moral of the story: I want to go on a freakin date! A real date. With someone who is interested in having conversation and sharing a new experience. I’m not asking to be swept off my feet here. Staying true to my over-imaginative self, I’ve started a list of ideal dates. Whenever I come across something interesting I add it to my list.  Here are a few:

King Street Trolley

I’ve never been to Old Towne Alexandria, but I hear it’s nice. There’s a free trolley that takes you from one end to the other and I want to ride it and window shop. This would be perfect for a cool sunny day. Not while its sweltering outside like it is now.


Cork is a restaurant and wine bar in Logan Circle. Recently I’ve decided that I want to learn about wine. This restaurant has a billion selections and a well-educated wait staff. Why not eat and learn at the same time?

Double Decker DC Tour

I know I’ve been here for what seems like forever now. I’ve never done the tourist thing. I want to sit on the upper level with all the people who don’t speak english and learn about the district. Plus I got the hook-up on two-day tickets.

Bike Riding

I am nowhere close to being a fan of strenuous physical activity. The fact that I want to ride a bike is amazing in and of itself. I want to go on a leisure ride somewhere near the water. Leisure meaning I’d ride slow. I ain’t trying to catch any cramps, although I know it would be inevitable with my out of shape ass. I need to get in a gym.

Picnic On The Mall

All these years and I’ve been out to the national mall with a blanket once. Never been on a picnic. I want to pack a basket full of sandwiches fruit and candy. I want to enjoy the sunshine and make out shapes in the clouds.

One day I will go to these places and do these things. Eff it, I may even take myself to all these places.

There’s Always An Alternative

I know The Bible says that you aren’t supposed to hate anyone or any thing, but I’m not perfect and the Lord knows my heart. I HATE FLOWERS. Besides the fact that I’m allergic to them (I’m allergic to everything), I don’t find them pleasing to the eye or nose. As far as I’m concerned, the only time I have been and ever will be happy receiving flowers are when they come from (The Coolest Man In The World) my daddy.

There are plenty of alternatives to giving me flowers. Here are a few suggestions:

  1. Candy – Every girl has a favorite candy. I have plenty. There are major major points given for bringing me nerds, now and laters, or any of the sweets that satisfy my sweet tooth.
  2. A Note – Think elementary school. Words written on paper can go a long way. It doesn’t have to be anything spectacular. The fact that time was taken to write something is more than enough.
  3. A book – Yes. A book. I love to read and write. I’m always making a list of some sort, and I’ll give just about any book a chance. You don’t have to spend $40 on a hardback bestseller. Every bookstore has a sale section. Or you can drop by your local convenience store and grab a cute notebook for a few bucks.
  4. A pen – Something about cool pens. There’s nothing else to say. I like them. The end

I’ve yet to receive any of these on a date other than #1. When I do, I’m definitely going to ask the thoughtful gentleman if he read this post.


So, the other day there was a trending topic on twitter, #thatswhyyoursingle. As I read all of the redundantly ignorant reasons, I grew increasingly irritated. Besides the fact the the damn shit wasn’t grammatically correct, (yes I said damn shit. I’m irritated) most of the people “going in” on a topic which should be reserved for persons with “Dr.” in front of their name lack a significant other.

Regardless of how frustrating the coonery on my timeline was, it did get me to thinking. No, I did not go soul searching or diving for personal faults that may have rendered me manless. I am quite fine with being single. The tangent to which my thoughts decided to wander off on led me to the very reason why I personally think I am single.


Every single guy that I have dated has taught me something different, either about myself or about men in general. I may not see the lesson right away because I’m a woman with emotions and all that good shit, but hindsight is 20fuckin20.

Thought I’d share three of these men and their lessons with the blogisphere:

The First – not my first, but the first man I dated that mattered. He taught me to learn a person, not just get to know them. He also taught me how to open up, which is something that I had never planned on doing. And to this day, I have yet to be dishonest with him, and only want the best for him no matter what. I bet he has no idea… Ah well!!

The Friend – This one taught me more through our experience. The most important things I learned  were how to recognize when I’m giving more than I’m receiving, and when how to accept that I can’t be who others want me to be. With him I also got to experience pursuing a man, just a little bit. It’s nothing that I want to practice too much. Lastly, he taught me that I can not date super social men who spread themselves thin.

The Graduate – The very things that led me to stop dating him are what I learned from him. There is life outside of the college scene. Every man is not going to want to hang out with my friends. Now that I don’t always want to hang out with my friends, what was once a part of the reason we ended, is now seen as a quality.

Now when it comes to dating, I apply the things that these men have taught me. I can confidently say that each experience is better than the last. I don’t mind being single as long as I keep on learning.