Hair ADD: It’s Real and I’m Suffering

I want this cut!!

Hi, my name is Bethany and I have a problem. *lowers eyes* *finds comfort in the monotone “Hi Bethany” from the “group”* I have natural hair ADD.
Every other day I want to change my hair. I don’t even have that much hair on my head!! It all started when I cut my perm off. You know, the Big Chop. Mine wasn’t that big.  I wanted to grow my natural hair out and experiment with every style out there. Then I realized that my hair does not grow at the speed of light, and I began to miss the carefree days of waking up and brushing. No prep. No untwisting. No styling.

No, I want This hair! Now!! Grow hair! GROW!!!

Now that my hair is once again the masterpiece of my barber, I have an urge to grow it all over again. Why? Because of the pictures I see every day. Twitter, Pinterest and blogs like show these women with glorious coils and curls and their crown. They look amazing! I want that. But I don’t have any hair!!! Why? Because I decided that it would be a great idea to cut it all of again.
To add one more insult to all of my nappy-headed misery, I have decided on a new spring/summer style. I am going to get braids. Yes. Braids. Like these:

You can't tell me that those braids aren't amazeballs.

Why? Because they are dopeness in extension form. If I didn’t have a job with a dress code and strict rules on appearance I would get these:

I would do this in a heartbeat. Eff work *kicks rocks*

The braids will likely be temporary. I’ll keep them until I feel that my ‘fro is at a length worth showing  off to the world. My real challenge will be patience. I have to grow my hair long enough for braids. I already hate this process. I am about to look something like a dusty farm child. This is the phase where I have th hardest time fighting the urge to walk into the closest establishment with clippers.
I bow to stick to it. No cutting my hair. It’s ok if I look a little shabby for a while. I’ll have to turn this into shabby chic. Stay tuned.

Have You Missed Me?

I haven’t been producing any content for my corner of wordpress for the past few weeks. I wish I could say that it’s because I’ve been so busy doing all types of great things. Truthfully, I’ve been doing the same things as usual. It seems that I haven’t been able to churn out any material that I’d deem quality. I’ve scribbled over more words in the past month than I’ve written in the past six. I don’t feel like I’m exploring my ideas enough. I’m not even trying to become some profound blogger. I just don’t publish crap. I’ve been writing crap. I’m going to try to write myself through this drought, and will be back over in this neck of the woods when I start producing B.Renee gold. In the meantime, I’ve started a tumblr and discontinued A Song For Saturday. All (most) things music related can be found HERE.

I’ll be back soon with my opinion on some random topic. I promise

Are Good Christians Allowed To Listen To Secular Music?

I was washing dishes and talking to God the other day, and thought of the above question. Yes, I talk to God while doing household chores. Me and the Big Guy have a unique relationship. He gets me.

Ok, back to my question. There is no need for me to explain my love for music. But as a good Christian woman am I allowed to listen to secular music? I”m not there yet, but I’m working on it. I just need to know if I have to stop listening to Hip Hop and R&B in order to get there. Don’t get me wrong, I love all music. Honestly. I listen to Gospel and Contemporary Christian, not so much Christian rap (not too fond of it), but I love me some Hip Hop and R&B along with occasional pop and rock. Love.

I know what Lucifer’s position in heaven was and I know all about his fall. I don’t listen to anything that blatantly worships the devil. I love lyrics. I love wordplay. I don’t think that will change as I grow closer to God. I do think that what I choose to listen to will evolve as the artists in the music industry evolve.  But seriously!!! I need answers!

Please Go Take A Parenting Class

I do not have children, but I do know plenty of people who are parents. Some are excellent, and some make wonder. Some questions that come to mind when I’m in the presence of horrible parenting are:

1. Do you really think that what you’re doing is going to work?

2. You know that YOU are the parent right?

3. Do you see your child right now?

4. Have you ever thought about taking a parenting class? Please take a parenting class!!

What kinds of things bring up these questions? I’m glad you asked.

  • Do you know what a little person’s job is? To fill our lives with love and affection, of course. They are also supposed to get on our nerves and test the patience of every grown person with whom they happen to come in contact. That is not a valid excuse for your day to be ruined as soon as your feet hit the floor. The little person doesn’t know any better. They are simply living their little person life. Your attitude won’t do anything but make them look at you with the ill side eye and go back to playing with their toys.
  • When there are twenty-plus years between you two, there should be no such things as an option. You want to give out options? Here’s one for you – Do what I say or catch a backhand. 
  • We’ve always been told that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and it’s my personal favorite. As we say in the wonderful world of twitter, Breakfasts >>>>>. With that said, I would like to point out a key word: BREAKFAST.  Here are some things that do not fall under the breakfast umbrella:
  • Goldfish
  • Any random remnants of candy found in a car seat
  • Any form of potato chip. This includes baked, healthy choice and veggie.
  • Oreo Cakesters
  • Children are taught to listen to grown ups. No child will obey someone their age. Bargaining will never lead to success, and your child will walk away from you like the crumbsnatchers in daycare. Man up. Act your age.

That concludes my first installment of Please Go Take A Parenting Class!




Growing up, I used to want to be a myriad of things when I became an adult. A great musician – can’t play an instrument or read a note of sheet music. A neonatologist – I figured out how many years of school were required and let that one go quickly. A day care owner – this one still pops up from time to time, but as something I want to do when I’m older. A teacher – only lasted a few days. You get my point.

Never have I wanted to be her. I’ve never wanted to treat people like dirt, and act like none of it ever happened when I need something. So I don’t. I’ve never wanted to drown my problems in alcohol. So I haven’t. I’ve never aspired to depend on substances. So I haven’t. I’ve never dreamed of allowing anger and depression take over my life. So I haven’t.

Becoming her doesn’t happen overnight. There is a mentality behind that way of life that I do not possess. She turned to things for comfort and answers instead of God and her family. She swam in an olympic sized pool of her own sorrows instead of doing something about what made her unhappy. She conveniently forgot how to support herself financially, mentally and emotionally. All of her everything lay in one thing and one thing only.

Nothing about the previous statements described the person that I am, the person who I’ve been or the person who I am becoming. When I hear that people who should know better are looking at me as if I’m her… When I notice that people are treating me in such a way that I know they are thinking of her… It is infuriating.

I am not her. I don’t want to be her. I never will be anything close to her. It is sad that  the very people who taught me, and exposed me to a lifestyle that equipped me to be the opposite of her, are looking at me and seeing her. These people, who have been educated in the type of person that she is. They should all know more than anyone. Me does not equal her. Me is not similar to her.

I am not changing anything about myself in an attempt to convince people who should need no convincing in the first place. Keep relating me to her and I will remove myself until I no longer feel that being myself will be met with insults.

*steps off of soap box*

*drops mic*

*flips imaginary hair*

*walks away*

There’s Just Me…. A Rant

I read a lot of blogs, probably more than I should. It seems like lately there have been an abundance of posts dealing with women. The type of women men want, the type they hate, the ideal combination of types, and the reasons why certain types will never get wifed. It’s all starting to get a little old.

I am B.Renee. Period. There’s just me. I’m not a type of girl that fits into a category. Hell, I’ve found parts of my personality in almost every single blog post! Does it mean that I’m only going to date a certain type of man because I genuinely enjoy sports and don’t care for make-up, I’m pretty and I know it, or because I have more female friends than male, or I feel that a woman should be treated with respect, I don’t care about a man’s money…. I could go on for days.

And don’t get me started on the comments that are made on these blogs. A smorgasbord of “_____ all do ____” and “all ____ men like _____ women”. Let me not forget ” ______ girls are cute/need love too!!”  Shuuuut UUUP!!

Why do I (all women) have to fit into a category? I understand that people have certain characteristics that they look for in potential dates/mates/significant others, but can it just be left at that? Stop trying to put me in a box! I’m too curvy for all of that. (you see what I did there)

But seriously. I’m me, myself and I. I am not “B the ______ girl” and will never identify as such.